Being Grounded

Being Grounded has to do with your thinking, the way you experience what is going on around you and what you think about it. Your thinking will affect how you are able to engage with others, or not. A lack of groundedness can completely undermine your best efforts to be relational because your expectations for yourself and others are out of line with reality.

You may be caught up in thoughts that create much of your suffering and your frustration with your life and the people in it, thoughts that are essentially untrue, thoughts that are not grounded in truth, thoughts that become beliefs which limit your ability to see your world as it truly is. This negatively affects you and others, gets in the way of positive relationships, and often needlessly escalates conflict.

In Contrast: Being Grounded is not:

You will know that your thoughts are in fact delusions, disconnected from truth when:
  • You think some situation, something, or someone, including yourself, will never change or will always be a certain way.
  • You give up and passively become a victim of your circumstances.
  • You mired in thinking about what you deserve, what should be, what ought to be or could be if only.
  • You lost in dreaming about a beautiful future without doing anything to create it.
  • You are stuck in the past and how good it is compared to now.
  • You obsess about the past and what could have been, should have been, or ought to have been, if only.
  • You judge a person or situation on a mere snippet of information–-a blink.
  • You apply labels to individuals, groups, and organizations and believe them.
  • You act habitually based on your coping strategies and without self- awareness.

How do you discern or look harder at someone or something you are unhappy with? How are you open to versions of the truth that are different from your own?

Learn to recognize your patterns of thought and feeling and impulses and make space in your thinking for maybe, maybe not. Free yourself from the limiting habits of your thoughts and find a new sense of who you are, the authentic you. Discovering this new truth about yourself will allow you to be more open to others as they are. Relational reciprocity will increase the chance that they in turn will be more open to you, as you are.

Explore Being Grounded

When your desires focus on obtaining something that is not with you now, something that promises to be better and more fulfilling, then you risk subordinating the importance of the present so completely to the potential of the future that the joy of the present is lost.


Being Grounded means living in the now. The challenge lies in knowing when and how to use thinking about the past and future and in knowing when that thinking is not helpful.